i hate posting two new things so close to each other, but this made me chuckle. a lot...
After getting all of Pope Benedict's luggage loaded into the limo, (and he doesn't travel light), the driver notices the Pope is still standing on the curb.
'Excuse me, Your Holiness,' says the driver, 'Would you please take your seat so we can leave?'
'Well, to tell you the truth,' says the Pope, 'they never let me drive at the Vatican when I was a cardinal, and I'd really like to drive today.'
'I'm sorry, Your Holiness, but I cannot let you do that.. I'd lose my job! What if something should happen?' protests the driver, wishing he'd never gone to work that morning...
'Who's going to tell?' says the Pope with a smile.
Reluctantly, the driver gets in the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 115 mph. (Remember, the Pope is German..)
'Please slow down, Your Holiness!' pleads the worried driver, but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens and see flashing lights.
'Oh, dear God, I'm going to lose my license -- and my job!' moans the driver.
The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches, but the cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio.
'I need to talk to the Chief,' he says to the dispatcher.
The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he's stopped a limo going 115 mph
'So bust him,' says the Chief.
'I don't think we want to do that, he's really important,' said the cop.
The Chief exclaimed,' All the more reason!'
'No, I mean really important,' said the cop with a bit of persistence.
The Chief then asked, 'Who do you have there, the mayor?'
Cop: 'Bigger.'
Chief: ' A senator?'
Cop: 'Bigger.'
Chief: 'The President?'
Cop: 'Bigger..'
'Well,' said the Chief, 'who is it?'
Cop: 'I think it's God!'
The Chief is even more puzzled and curious, 'What makes you think it's God?'
Cop: 'His chauffeur is the Pope!'
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Good to think about
My Dad sent me this prayer, and it's sooo true. You never know what battles people are fighting on the inside so don't judge...
Heavenly Father, Help us remember that the jerk who cut us off in traffic last night is a single mother who worked nine hours that day and is rushing home to cook dinner, help with homework, do the laundry and spend a few precious moments with her children.
Help us to remember that the pierced, tattooed, disinterested young man who can't make change correctly is a worried 19-year-old college student, balancing his apprehension over final exams with his fear of not getting his student loans for next semester.
Remind us, Lord, that the scary looking bum, begging for money in the same spot every day (who really ought to get a job!) is a slave to addictions that we can only imagine in our worst nightmares.
Help us to remember that the old couple walking annoyingly slow through the store aisles an d blocking our shopping progress are savoring this moment, knowing that, based on the biopsy report she got back last week, this will be the last year that they go shopping together.
Heavenly Father, remind us each day that, of all the gifts you give us, the greatest gift is love. It is not enough to share that love with those we hold dear. Open our hearts not to just those who are close to us, but to all humanity. Let us be slow to judge and quick to forgive, show patience, empathy and love.
Working for God on earth doesn't pay much......but His retirement plan is out of this world
Heavenly Father, Help us remember that the jerk who cut us off in traffic last night is a single mother who worked nine hours that day and is rushing home to cook dinner, help with homework, do the laundry and spend a few precious moments with her children.
Help us to remember that the pierced, tattooed, disinterested young man who can't make change correctly is a worried 19-year-old college student, balancing his apprehension over final exams with his fear of not getting his student loans for next semester.
Remind us, Lord, that the scary looking bum, begging for money in the same spot every day (who really ought to get a job!) is a slave to addictions that we can only imagine in our worst nightmares.
Help us to remember that the old couple walking annoyingly slow through the store aisles an d blocking our shopping progress are savoring this moment, knowing that, based on the biopsy report she got back last week, this will be the last year that they go shopping together.
Heavenly Father, remind us each day that, of all the gifts you give us, the greatest gift is love. It is not enough to share that love with those we hold dear. Open our hearts not to just those who are close to us, but to all humanity. Let us be slow to judge and quick to forgive, show patience, empathy and love.
Working for God on earth doesn't pay much......but His retirement plan is out of this world
Monday, October 26, 2009
prayer request
Hey all,
I have a very special prayer request for all of you. Recently one of my friend's and teammate's brothers died. I ask that you can keep her and her family in your prayers these next few days as they deal with this hardship. Also, please keep her brother, Mikey, in your prayers as well. He was a firefighter and a good man. He will be greatly missed.
Thank you all.
I have a very special prayer request for all of you. Recently one of my friend's and teammate's brothers died. I ask that you can keep her and her family in your prayers these next few days as they deal with this hardship. Also, please keep her brother, Mikey, in your prayers as well. He was a firefighter and a good man. He will be greatly missed.
Thank you all.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
A Rae of Hope
I would like to thank all the hundreds of Marist students who took time out of their day last Wednesday to go to Applebees to support the Sloan-Kettering Cancer society and Rae. The turnout was phenomenal! Better than anyone would have expected...
Allison Burke, one of Rae's teammates, shares her perspective...
I took a lap inside Applebee’s last Wednesday evening. I passed Marist’s dean of the school of management, a statistics professor, the director of housing, counselors, and Father Richard Lamorte, on my right. On my left, I passed Marist’s assistant athletic director, the athlete’s academic advisor, the women’s basketball team and coaches, the water polo team, the baseball team, and football coach Jim Parady. And in between, every booth was filled with familiar students.
The hostess told each party they would have to wait an hour to be seated, but ran out of buzzers to give each of them. So they waited outside in 30-degree weather for a table to open up. But by the end of the night, over $650 was donated to Memorial Sloan-Kettering Pediatrics Cancer Center in Raeanna Gutkowski’s name.
“Applebee's told us they are never that crowded - not even on Friday's or Saturday's,” said senior Alicia Mattiello.
Mattiello is one of the four group members who created the “A Rae of Hope” event series in honor of our teammate, Gutkowski. Rae left campus last spring after being diagnosed with Osteosarcoma, but appreciates the capstone project.
“Just because I got sick, doesn’t mean I would ever ask for anything in return,” said Rae. “But nevertheless, the support and love that people from my home and the Marist community give has been overwhelming. It makes me speechless and I just want to cry because I have so much emotion that I can’t put into words.”
Like many collegiate athletes, Rae suffered a knee injury in the middle of spring practice. But unlike most 20-year-old volleyball players, Rae’s test results revealed the unimaginable reality of bone cancer.
While Rae continues to battle cancer, the volleyball team will play a benefit game for her.
“It is just one more thing that my teammates and coaches have done to make me feel so special,” said Rae.
On Nov. 1, the Foxy Ladies will face Iona to complete the “A Rae of Hope” event series. Admission is free, but prizes such as sports memorabilia and local restaurant gift certificates will be raffled off and donations will be accepted to raise money for Rae.
Medical complications have pushed Rae’s return to campus back farther. But as long as her chemotherapy schedule permits, she will attend the game and complete our 12-person roster.
Last Saturday, Marist President Denis Murray was part of our pre-match huddle. He congratulated the team and project’s group members. “A Rae of Hope” carries the Marist spirit in place of its missing member, who has a message for all of us.
“Everyone around our age looks at cancer as something they don’t need to think about for another 50 years,” said Rae. “But unfortunately, that isn’t true. Your life can be changed in a heartbeat, so enjoy your health, take care of yourself, and have fun in college!”
Allison Burke, one of Rae's teammates, shares her perspective...
I took a lap inside Applebee’s last Wednesday evening. I passed Marist’s dean of the school of management, a statistics professor, the director of housing, counselors, and Father Richard Lamorte, on my right. On my left, I passed Marist’s assistant athletic director, the athlete’s academic advisor, the women’s basketball team and coaches, the water polo team, the baseball team, and football coach Jim Parady. And in between, every booth was filled with familiar students.
The hostess told each party they would have to wait an hour to be seated, but ran out of buzzers to give each of them. So they waited outside in 30-degree weather for a table to open up. But by the end of the night, over $650 was donated to Memorial Sloan-Kettering Pediatrics Cancer Center in Raeanna Gutkowski’s name.
“Applebee's told us they are never that crowded - not even on Friday's or Saturday's,” said senior Alicia Mattiello.
Mattiello is one of the four group members who created the “A Rae of Hope” event series in honor of our teammate, Gutkowski. Rae left campus last spring after being diagnosed with Osteosarcoma, but appreciates the capstone project.
“Just because I got sick, doesn’t mean I would ever ask for anything in return,” said Rae. “But nevertheless, the support and love that people from my home and the Marist community give has been overwhelming. It makes me speechless and I just want to cry because I have so much emotion that I can’t put into words.”
Like many collegiate athletes, Rae suffered a knee injury in the middle of spring practice. But unlike most 20-year-old volleyball players, Rae’s test results revealed the unimaginable reality of bone cancer.
While Rae continues to battle cancer, the volleyball team will play a benefit game for her.
“It is just one more thing that my teammates and coaches have done to make me feel so special,” said Rae.
On Nov. 1, the Foxy Ladies will face Iona to complete the “A Rae of Hope” event series. Admission is free, but prizes such as sports memorabilia and local restaurant gift certificates will be raffled off and donations will be accepted to raise money for Rae.
Medical complications have pushed Rae’s return to campus back farther. But as long as her chemotherapy schedule permits, she will attend the game and complete our 12-person roster.
Last Saturday, Marist President Denis Murray was part of our pre-match huddle. He congratulated the team and project’s group members. “A Rae of Hope” carries the Marist spirit in place of its missing member, who has a message for all of us.
“Everyone around our age looks at cancer as something they don’t need to think about for another 50 years,” said Rae. “But unfortunately, that isn’t true. Your life can be changed in a heartbeat, so enjoy your health, take care of yourself, and have fun in college!”
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Father LaMorte answers a question
Among the questions that have been submitted via the '?' cards available in the Chapel was:
"Is the mass an absolute requirement?”
The short answer: Yes.
And not only are we required to go, but it is considered a grave matter of sin if we do not go (and otherwise reasonably could have gone). This is a judgment that the person has to make.
From the beginning, the Church has always seen this as the primary (and bare minimum) fulfillment of the 3rd commandment: Keep holy the Sabbath day (the Christian Sabbath being The Lord’s Day). In the full Christian sense, “keeping the Sabbath holy” is to actually participate in the most fundamental of Christian celebrations - the mass.
Perhaps, the question might be raised as to whether the Resurrection would be considered important enough to warrant our not wanting to miss an opportunity to join in the communities celebration of it. This is the most deliberately specific thing that Jesus gave Christians to do after he left (“Do this in memory of me”).
And I contemplate that we truly, physically receive the body and blood of Christ - of God Himself - at every Mass. And I consider that communion with God is the ultimate goal of my life. Then I can’t wait to go. Attending mass is not just an obligation, it’s a privilege! It’s a gift.
"Is the mass an absolute requirement?”
The short answer: Yes.
And not only are we required to go, but it is considered a grave matter of sin if we do not go (and otherwise reasonably could have gone). This is a judgment that the person has to make.
From the beginning, the Church has always seen this as the primary (and bare minimum) fulfillment of the 3rd commandment: Keep holy the Sabbath day (the Christian Sabbath being The Lord’s Day). In the full Christian sense, “keeping the Sabbath holy” is to actually participate in the most fundamental of Christian celebrations - the mass.
Perhaps, the question might be raised as to whether the Resurrection would be considered important enough to warrant our not wanting to miss an opportunity to join in the communities celebration of it. This is the most deliberately specific thing that Jesus gave Christians to do after he left (“Do this in memory of me”).
And I contemplate that we truly, physically receive the body and blood of Christ - of God Himself - at every Mass. And I consider that communion with God is the ultimate goal of my life. Then I can’t wait to go. Attending mass is not just an obligation, it’s a privilege! It’s a gift.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Gospel Reflection
In the second half of today’s gospel reading Jesus rebukes His disciples for hindering the children from coming to Him. We are all children of God—what is it that stands in our way and causes us to stray?
Today’s reading clearly demonstrates God’s love for all of us as He reiterates how much He wants to see us, wants to help us, wants to just be there for us in any way. It is our own shortcomings that prevent us from feeling Him at our sides at every moment.
So I challenge you all to look inside yourselves and find exactly what it is that is keeping you from running into God’s outstretched arms and confiding wholly in Him.
Discard your distractions, your feelings of inadequacy, even those people and events that deter you from seeking out God’s presence in every day life. Trust Him. Trust yourself. Allow yourself to accept the endless blessings.
Today’s reading clearly demonstrates God’s love for all of us as He reiterates how much He wants to see us, wants to help us, wants to just be there for us in any way. It is our own shortcomings that prevent us from feeling Him at our sides at every moment.
So I challenge you all to look inside yourselves and find exactly what it is that is keeping you from running into God’s outstretched arms and confiding wholly in Him.
Discard your distractions, your feelings of inadequacy, even those people and events that deter you from seeking out God’s presence in every day life. Trust Him. Trust yourself. Allow yourself to accept the endless blessings.
Friday, October 2, 2009
Find time for thank-yous
If you 're like me, you don’t thank God nearly as much as you should. Thoughts of all the homework, laundry, and cleaning you have to do later, or this past weekend’s escapades, or next week’s plans consume your mind. When you’re always running around, rushing from one assignment to the next, from the gym to the shower, to dinner, and back to homework- with a little bit of texting, chatting, and Facebooking in between it is so easy to forget to thank God regularly. The notion that God is the reason we are blessed with an awesome family, group of friends ,and an opportunity to attend Marist slips our minds all too often, or at least for me it does.
Realizing God’s influence in all the good (and even the bad) things in your life can be extremely uplifting. I am sure there are some aspects of your life that you wish were different, but put those thoughts aside for a minute. Instead think about all the blessings in your life. Try and list them all in your head. Doing this puts things into perspective better.
It’s okay to be stressed about an upcoming test or a fight with your significant other, but before these sorts of things become overbearing, realize how much you have to be thankful for in the grand scheme of things; take a change to count your blessings and you may be surprised just how many of them there are.
In between classes, tests, papers, laundry, the gym, text messages, and Facebook, take a little break to recognize God’s incredible generosity in your life… and then don’t forget to say thank-you for it.
Realizing God’s influence in all the good (and even the bad) things in your life can be extremely uplifting. I am sure there are some aspects of your life that you wish were different, but put those thoughts aside for a minute. Instead think about all the blessings in your life. Try and list them all in your head. Doing this puts things into perspective better.
It’s okay to be stressed about an upcoming test or a fight with your significant other, but before these sorts of things become overbearing, realize how much you have to be thankful for in the grand scheme of things; take a change to count your blessings and you may be surprised just how many of them there are.
In between classes, tests, papers, laundry, the gym, text messages, and Facebook, take a little break to recognize God’s incredible generosity in your life… and then don’t forget to say thank-you for it.
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